Most of us can’t imagine going through a divorce when we take that fairy tale walk down the aisle. The key is to remember that you can get through the pain and disappointment and be happy again.
Common worries, fears and emotions after divorce:
- General fear of change or uncertainty
- Can I handle being alone?
- Will I have enough money?
- Can I handle being a single parent?
- What will my family and friends think?
- Feeling of betrayal, anger and guilt
Myths, societal expectations and other negative beliefs that you may need to learn to overcome:
- Marriage is always “ 'til death do us part”
- Staying together is better for the kids
- Having a failed marriage means I’m a failure
- This isn’t supposed to happen to me
- A particular definition of “happiness”
- A particular definition of “family”
Steps to feeling better, regaining personal control and becoming self-sufficient:
- Realize that it is okay to ask for and accept help
- Realize that some things are just not within your control (and may never be)
- Learn to better manage the things you can control by organizing, prioritizing, delegating and letting go
Practical strategies for surviving this life transition and thriving again:
- Seek/accept support from friends and family
- Engage in regular exercise
- Practice deep breathing and mindfulness
- Practice yoga and meditation
- Use a journal to process thoughts and feelings
- Engage in other self-care activities such as time alone to read, take a bubble bath or watch a movie. You must take care of yourself to be able to take care of your children (or others).